MY SITE
  • BLOG
  • ABOUT DONNA
  • CONTACT

​​FUN

WITH
​
HEIRLOOMS





DECORATING WITH THE HUBS

4/24/2018

7 Comments

 
Picture









Originally published in Sunday's New Castle Courier-Times.

Some women complain that their husbands have no opinions when it comes to home decor. And their problem is?

When Mrs. Noah suggested a new wallcovering for her floatable abode, I imagine that Noah told her to go ahead and pick it out. Why rock the ark? he probably thought.

For most of our marriage, Brian has had what I consider a perfectly appropriate response when I ask for his preference in paint colors or carpeting textures. He says, “I don’t care, Honey. You decide.”

Now that he’s retired, however, Brian’s interest in all-things-home has taken a turn.

For the most part, this is good. I have no problem with his weekly vacuum-cleaning routine. He’s fond of showing me the canister containing the week’s collection of assorted lint and grime, similar to a cat bringing in a prize catch from the woods.

“Oh wow, Honey, that’s a lot of dirt,” I encourage. “Good job!”

I also don’t mind when he does laundry. “You do such a great job,” I tell him. I leave out the part where I hide my whites and delicates to do later on my own.

But his hands-on-household help has resulted in something to which I’m still trying to adjust: He has opinions on things; things he didn’t used to care about.

Recently I moved a large wreath from the bedroom to the living room. Before I could swap out something to replace the bare space in the bedroom, Brian swept in with his own offering: a circa 1980s print depicting an old-fashioned classroom. I must have bought it for his school office back in the day at one of the home-decor parties so popular then – and forgot about it. Then he retired and it returned home with him.

“I always liked that picture,” he said wistfully when he showed it off to me hanging in its new place of honor, no less than the first thing you see as you approach our bedroom.

I wanted to ask if he noticed that it was not only dated, but sun-faded, and inquire as to how the inside of the glass covering the print could have possibly gotten that peculiar odd blemish. But I didn’t. Instead, I closed my mouth and bit my tongue.

I’m also not a fan of the stuff he leaves on top of his dresser. Mine has only a jar filled with eucalyptus situated on a doily. I like the sparseness. He has a basket on his dresser that I put there as a hint to fill it with his dresser dressings. The idea is to round up all those vitamins, change, glasses cleaner, calendar, pen and other unrelated sundries and corral them in the basket.

He doesn’t see the point. I’ve even tried to move these things to the basket myself but that seemed to violate his personal space. He asked me to leave his belongings right where he left them and in exchange he'll do the same with mine.

Except, he generally leaves a T-shirt and pair of shorts on top of my dresser. Whaaaat?

He doesn’t like the pole lamp that I moved next to the bedroom recliner. I think it’s a huge upgrade from the low-light lamp on the table next to the chair.

I think his closet needs a makeover.

He doesn’t like the way I wear socks to bed only to kick them off in the night and leave them wadded at the foot of the bed.

True, we have our petty grievances.

Back when Oprah had a weekday talk show, whenever she had a counselor on the program, she seemed to always work in her viewpoint about relationships. Oprah would say that if a couple argues about “the socks,” it’s not really about “the socks.”

She’s right. It’s also about the pole lamp, the dresser clutter and the faded picture.

But then, marriage is also about knowing when to make allowances for each other’s preferences – and then carry on.

So we carry on. But I don’t think I’ll suggest any new decorating projects just now.

Donna Cronk is Neighbors editor of The Courier-Times and edits the quarterly her magazine for women. She blogs twice a week and enjoys encouraging other women through programs for a variety of women's groups and organizations.

7 Comments
Lynnette McMahan
4/25/2018 05:43:58 am

Next, he will be in the kitchen reseasoning your soup and offering all kinds of cooking advice.

Reply
Donna Cronk
4/25/2018 07:11:59 am

He does surprise me, Annette. Even after almost 40 years. It seems as though we should still be 40 -- not be 65 (Brian will be on Friday) or 60 (me in October).

Reply
Donna Cronk
4/29/2018 11:23:07 am

LYNETTE -- not Annette!!! Sorry!

Reply
Geri Murray
4/25/2018 04:25:06 pm

Please tell me this is not so, Donna! That instead, you fabricated the whole story by elaborating on a dream from a couple of nights ago.
If this situation happens in a few years at 3461 E Velocipede Pike, Liberty, I’m pretty sure it’ll be followed by a court date. I’ve enjoyed just over 39 years of Mike’s decorating complacence, his insistence that he always likes what I come up with. I don’t want that to change!
You have my best wishes in dealing with your “unfortunate situation.”
I know what you mean about the faded pictures from the old home decor parties, there are probably 3 or 4 of those in a box around here.

Reply
Donna Cronk
4/25/2018 05:54:51 pm

No dream sequence, Geri. See what fun you have ahead!

Reply
Debbie M. link
4/29/2018 05:56:52 am

Your post made me chuckle! Every now and then Tom will have input on decorating, like when he suggested moving bookshelves from the living room to the bonus room over the garage. It was brilliant and I never "envisioned" it. Other times, he has shared that my decorations were too "old lady-like." I parted with them and to my surprise, found something I liked even better that I wouldn't have without his comment.

Here is where my problem comes in... my husband lets me choose the paint colors. However, there is an unwritten rule that once a room is freshly painted, it will be that way for the rest of our lives!!!! Oh the pressure to pick out a color that I won't be able to change.

Reply
Donna Cronk
4/29/2018 11:24:11 am

Sounds like Tom has offered some great input.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    DONNA CRONK

    FUN WITH HEIRLOOMS
    is my most popular program for 2023, inspired by my memoir There's a Clydesdale in the Attic: Reflections on Keeping and Letting Go. Contact me to hear about my programs for your event.

    CONTACT: Let's talk about it. Call me at 317-224-7028. Email:
    newsgirl.1958@gmail.
    com.  



    Archives

    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015

    Categories

    All
    Age Thing
    Aging
    Author Journey
    Christmas
    Clydesdale In The Attic
    Cooking
    Cooties
    Crafts
    Creepy!
    Decor
    Faith
    Family
    Farm
    Fashion
    Friendships
    Gardening
    God Bless America
    Gratitude
    Guest Posts
    Hair!
    Halloween
    Holidays
    Home
    Indiana
    Indiana Bicentennial
    Keeping The Peace
    Life Connections
    Mail Call
    Newspapers
    Next Chapter
    Pen Women
    Photography
    Poison Ivy!
    Quilting Club
    Reggie
    Retirement
    Sadness
    Seasons
    Seller's Cabinet
    Shopping
    Sleep
    Snow Day
    Tourism
    Travel
    Union County
    Weird Food
    What We Keep
    Writer Chicks Society
    Writing

Proudly powered by Weebly
Photos used under Creative Commons from Lise1011, Simone Ramella, StarsApart, Biblioteca General Antonio Machado, kennethkonica, roseannadana: Thank you for 3 million views, GotCredit, chuck4x5, besnette, nielskliim, James E. Petts, jeffdjevdet, rumolay, kkmarais, tgrauros, susivinh, Larry1732
  • BLOG
  • ABOUT DONNA
  • CONTACT